June 22nd, 2023
I had a nightmare. I dreamt that all worlds collided, and chaos ruled. I saw fish swimming in the skies, girls breaking the energy barrier, stuffed animals coming to life as tiny dolphins. Then, I awoke. And may God be my witness, I did not like it one bit. I was pulled back to my hospital bed, with my head rolled in white cloth. My veins clogged in pain killers and IV liquid, that couldn’t have been any less useful. I wanted to cry, but my eyes wouldn’t obey my commands. I was stuck in what felt like my private hell. And I knew that I had brought it all to myself. I knew that I was the prisoner and the guard, and that it was too late to even attempt to undo anything. My ambition led me here, but the price was far greater than I could have imagined. I was tricked, I was tricked by myself to believe that there was a slight possibility that I could have had any control over what my fate was to be. I tried to play God, and am now taking the consequences.
June 23rd, 2023
It's day two. DAY TWO! It feels like I have been here forever. It feels like I was born and raised inside this room, like I have never even experienced life outside. And that is the ultimate trick. I am reminded every other second of how it is like to eat regular food, to walk around on my own, to exist without pain. But again, have I ever existed without pain? Honestly, I can’t say I have. My inner demons torment me on a daily basis. Nope, erase that. Daily sounds too good for my reality. They torment me every second of my miserable life, they see my pain with every breath I take, and enjoy my tears of sorrow that always follow.
But now they’ve taken it too far. I was used to dealing with their torture from the within, but bringing it to the outside world … that’s just coward. They’ve taken the game to a realm in which I have no experience, in a realm where I can’t fight back. They’ve done it. They’ve taken my body and my soul, and the only reminder of either of their existence, is this text. This piece of poorly written writing. That will be the only reminder to the world that I have ever even been here.